


Goddess of the Basement Boys

by Basicallymonkey101



Series: Hagakure’s Goddess Harem [1]
Category: Dangan Ronpa - All Media Types
Genre: Alcohol, Embrace the Horny, F/M, Kaede literally a goddess, No Nut November who?, Weed, but with class, the boys don’t know her
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-01
Updated: 2020-11-01
Packaged: 2021-03-08 17:07:33
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 518
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27330202
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Basicallymonkey101/pseuds/Basicallymonkey101
Summary: Hiro gets another visit from a goddess
Relationships: Hagakure Yasuhiro/Akamatsu Kaede
Series: Hagakure’s Goddess Harem [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1995439
Kudos: 4





	Goddess of the Basement Boys

Hagakure lit another blunt as the clock flipped to midnight, preparing himself for the month of November. It was a challenge every year, but his good friends alcohol and drugs always helped him through. Four feet away from him, he could hear Teruteru giving an in depth review of a porno to Leon, while the red head slowly reached for a bottle of whiskey and a lighter. 

“Hey, Teru, are you gonna beat it or just complain?” Hiro asked, looking over to the dumpling shaped man. The two shared a look, before Teruteru scowled in disgust. “What do you take me for, a sex deprived lunatic? I have standards and I have dignity! Under no circumstances will I be partaking in these actions for the next month!”

“Then why are you watching it?” Leon asked, deciding that igniting himself wasn’t a good idea after all. The chef smiled, looking back to his screen and tracing a finger over the actress. “It’s the only entertaining thing we can afford to watch.”

The two non-Teruterus shrugged in agreement, before a blinding light came down from their ceiling. “Oh for fucks sake, not this again.” Leon said, grabbing two extra blunts and lighting them in advance. Teruteru ignored the light and went back to his high brow entertainment, while Hiro stared at the beacon before him. Had his wonderful weed goddess finally returned to him?

In an instant, the light faded and Kaede stood before him, holding a sign saying “Down With November.” She looked down at Hiro, staring at his massive package (of cocaine) and coming closer.

“Before anyone says anything, this doesn’t mess with the continuity of the Hifuharem, since Hifumi allows his disciples complete freedom to have their flings, so long as we don’t ruin our commitments to him.”

Leon promptly slammed his head into a wall and knocked himself out, not willing to put up with this bullshit.

“So uh....what are you the goddess of?” Hiro asked, looking at Kaede’s newly decked out Anti-November Shirt, Skirt, and Jefferson 1776s. “I’m the goddess of...high brow entertainment. Your friend in the corner kinda summoned me by playing that stuff during November.”

Teruteru gave a small wave, before continuing to judge every position and movement of the actress. Hiro looked between the two of them, before taking another drag of his blunt. “So uh...why are you taking to me then?”

Kaede looked back down at him, before sitting next to him on the couch. “Kyoko gave you a good review on Craigslist.” The three sat in a somewhat awkward silence, the only noise being Teruteru’s mumbles about how “Tsumugi’s content has been going downhill”

Kaede looked back at Hiro, before glancing back at his package (of coke). “Sooooooo. You wanna get it on?”

Looking at his blunt and his package(of the white stuff) Hiro said fuck it and dumped it onto the table. The two spent the night romantically doing cocaine and lighting Leon’s head on fire for fun because why not.

Legends say Teruteru is still reviewing his high brow entertainment to this very day.

**Author's Note:**

> weed man


End file.
